I’m gonna have to

Call this particular physicist out because he is out of his fucking mind.

This person obviously has a drinking problem or something. They don’t know how to act when they’re drunk and blows up my phone after I kinda denied them.

This person is out of their mind.

All weekend, once the clock strikes midnight, this faggot is on his phone messaging me. How long does it take to get the hint?

Then there’s another mother fucker that I just ghosted because I wasn’t attracted to them nor did I want to speak or hangout with them.

It’s all on Facebook, so I muted the physicist and blocked the ghost.

I haven’t gotten an A yet, so I will not have sex.

Have a good rest of your day!

I can

Never stand any of my lab partners… but this one is about all the annoying I can handle.

This guy is older.. he has to be a little older than me, at least. He writes every single thing down. Every single calculation, everything he does during lab.

So there was a lab where I had to leave early because my pump ripped off. I asked these idiots for the numbers and data, and he in particular gave me a bunch of useless data defined in his own way.

He kept calling everything a sample or a dilution… it’s like but where the fuck did these get diluted from?!

Every time I ask, he gives me an answer about the theory of the lab, and that’s not what the fuck I’m asking for.

I’m glad you want to show off that you u derstand the fucking theory, but give me the data in a way I can understand, and shut the fuck up.

Chemistry majors are about the most annoying mother fuckers on planet earth. Even when they ask questions in class, they try to show that they know all this shit…

It’s pretentious.


I have taken all of my exams for the week. I got a 78 on my analytical chemistry exam. The class average was a 75, so I’ll take that!

I’m not as confident about the biophysical chemistry exam. I ran out of time, and rushed many of the calculations.

As for biochemistry, I still have no idea what is going on in this class and I have an exam on Tuesday.

I’m fucked! So this weekend, it’s all bio all the time even though I hate the fucking class. Fuck my life bro.

I also have this huge fucking lab report I need to write for analytical. I might die this semester.

”Tis was a weird weekend. I don’t really have the words to fully describe it. It wasn’t bad, just kinda odd.

I got most of my studying for biophysical done. I need to study more, obviously… which I will do after lecture today. I never realized how much time I was spending doing nothing…

for instance, my Monday nights are so basic doing the ATA thing. It would make it a lot easier if I had that time available for other things.

Also, whenever I plan to wake up early and study, I end up waking up so fucking late and not doing shit.

I’ve been taking melatonin to fall asleep, but honestly… it doesn’t work well and I wake up groggy as fuck.

This week, I’m gonna type my lab report during their lab, and I don’t care what anyone has to say.

I got a 6.5/10 on the quiz, and I am expecting to do a little better on the exam. At least a B+ or something, so I will stay up for as long as I can.

I need to type this lab up today though!!


Just when I thought I got rid of the dry spell dude and planned on having a comfortable study day, I wake up to more Facebook messages at 2 Am.

I really believe that this guy has some issues. Maybe some drinking problem, or they just get drunk by themselves and bored or something… but I would love for this person to forget that I actually exist.

I had to block him. It was too awkward and weird, and it seemed as if homeboy couldn’t get the message.

He sent me some Who song about not getting fooled again or some shit. The song itself was about government take over, but I think he was trying to send me a message of some sort.

Whatever, niggas muted now. Lmfao.

OMG Ronnie!!!

So I felt so sick after my biophysical quiz on Monday that I skipped school yesterday. This weekend is gonna be a bitch so I’m preparing for it.

Omg Ronnie!!

I haven’t been very focused this semester, at all. I had a sit down chat with myself last night and really had to get my priorities in order.

This summer kinda got me in bad habits and shit. I went hard this summer, like I would never have sex again or something. My vagina wanted a break after July, but I went so hard…

I also realized that my mind was not on the prize. I began to doubt my ability to complete my bachelors degree in a timely matter. I began to think that I wouldn’t ever become an actual chemist… and those thoughts put me back on earth.

I am talented, and I can do this. I’ve been doing it for the past 3 months!

I have these exams coming up and I really need to start buckling down and getting my act together.

So NO EXCUSES THIS WEEKEND!!! I need to be able to do this shit in my sleep, bro. My biophysics teacher is working pretty slow though.

And the conversions are so annoying. Why the fuck would you make a nigga convert a gas constant?

That shit is trassshhh!!

And the way the homework is laid out for us is also trash. You’ll only be able to answer one or two questions after every lecture. I only have about 30% of the homework done and the exam is next week.

Guess what I will be doing all weekend you fucking cunt bags, that’s right, unit conversions.

I Feel So…

Behind this week… I have so much work I have to do, but I also recently dropped my afternoon class so I have a lot of extra time on my hands.

I may have to pull an all-nighter tonight to finish typing up my lab outlines for analytical chemistry. God this lab is so fucking annoying.

I have a physical chemistry quiz today. I have no idea what he is going to ask, but so far everything we are doing is pretty straightforward.

I am just going to make sure everything is done before Friday…

I got my first assignment to create more CCO in the lab… the first time I did it, I was working under max… so this will be the first actual time I’m doing it by myself.

I planned on starting it on Wednesday, so by Friday it should be purified and ready to go for photochemistry.

We will see!

My Fridays are so awesome now… I don’t have to deal with Arabic class which was getting on my last fucking nerve with the teacher’s teaching style. The bitch sucks… no if and’s or but’s.

In lonely physicist news, he hasn’t messaged me since Friday, which is a good sign. I think he got the hint…

I think he may have a drinking problem… I mean, I also have a drinking problem, but I just shut the fuck up about being drunk if I am.

He just kinda made an ass of himself; for a 34, 35 year old man, I just kinda expected someone not as awkward with better things to say… but instead he was kinda weird. We had nothing in common… and my past dealings with his fat tiny dick friend KEPT COMING UP…

He even had the nerve to ask how far Fatty and I went. That’s so fucking weird to ask…

It’s like he was going to imagine it then go jerk off in a sock about it later when he realized how lonely his existence is.

Fucking weird, but I hope I got that squared away.

Oh My Fucking God!!

I don’t know how to actually tell this man that he will NEVER have sex with me, and my hints are going ignored.

He is sending me pictures of his pets and shit. And when I don’t respond right away he’s all like “Hiiii” and being super annoying.

I was told that he needs a strong cut to get the picture… but this is a very awkward situation…

something’s gotta give…

UPDATE: I was able to sneak in a no. He didn’t want to take the no. He made everything really awkward. Idk what to even say at this point… ugh.

He had an out of being drunk so, I’m using that as an out out. Fuck!!!! So weird.

If I date you

And you have a cat… I probably dated you for the cat… I’m just gonna be honest.

So in the lab yesterday, the post doc I’m working with asked me to create CCO from fucking scratch bro!

I go to the reagent cabinet and there is no 1,5-cycloctene, so I haven’t done dick for the past two days.

I dropped arabic because I just wasn’t able to devote the time to it. This frees up a lot of time for research. I think I might continue doing 5 days a week in the lab, like I did this summer.

So Maximus took us out to lunch, then we celebrated either Turkish teacher got tenure, or it’s his birthday, I can’t remember… but Maxwell was deadass tryna get me drunk off Chinese rice wine.


But I love my group. I’m glad I joined this lab.

Are You Fucking Serious?

So my friend Jake, lovely fella he is, asked me a question today that just kinda seems obvious to anyone that has a normally functioning brain, but ok… fine.

He asked: can you get someone pregnant if you continue using a condom that you already jizzed in?

I obviously said that you could because everyone knows that the reason why they made condoms is to hold the jizz back.

I think he thought he sounded cool by telling me that he came and went again… but honestly, take the fucking condom off, put a new one on, then go again.

He said doing that is the best way to keep your dick ready…

So this reminded me of a story of this person that I slept with twice… his name was Louis.

Poor guy never fucked a box like mine. He lasted somewhere in the neighborhood of 1-3 minutes… but he kept going and finally, the condom detached from his dick and fell out of my vagina.

I was SO MAD.

There isn’t a real reason why anyone would do that unless they came way too quickly and wanted to hide it.

For this situation to actually make sense, he must’ve went soft after he came and the condom fell off or wouldn’t stay on.

Even when I slept with the hot physicist, and he came, he switched out the condom. He went soft right after though.

So now mother fucker has to go get a plan B. Duh bro!

How dumb…

Gotta love

When you email a teacher a question and they take 4 days to answer yet they don’t even answer the damn question!

I’m about to eat him for thanksgiving.

Speaking of, so I am, for the first time ever, going to train a dude on how to give me an orgasm.

I mean, I’m trying to go to grad school… this teaching experience will be invaluable! But seriously… so I will have to come up with some kind of lesson plan or something.

Don’t worry, he’ll be fucking all these sluts with reckless abandon after I’m done with his ass.

Watch me! πŸ˜‰

Mother fucker

Suck my dick tho!

Fuck… I don’t think I’m that good at solving buffer problems. Shit. Fuck. Bitch. Nigga shit.

Guess whose office I will be in today…

I can’t even understand him.

Trade with Max! And his sexy ass.




This is the fucking funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.

But ok, ok, let’s get serious here now…. we’ve got two little virginal physicists. One, is fucking sexy as fuck! He knows I think he is. I mentioned the fucking problems… but besides that, he can be trained.

Then we got dry spell, who can’t stop asking people questions about me. Like OD. He’s asking the hot one who thinks it’s fucking hilarious….

He needs to shut the fuck up! Like seriously. Stop fucking telling people about your personal life and asking for opinions like you’re not a mid 30’s adult.

I knew I made a good choice when the other one was like ughhhh….

Anyway, so biochem dude decided to reschedule the quiz so he can do his fucking job and show us all how to actually solve the fucking problems.

Good job! πŸ–•πŸΎ


So, one of them decided to be decent and talk to Eric. But Eric didn’t care.

Lol half cracked. Not full cracked. Full cracked decided to say he didn’t know me so I couldn’t just come out with it.

I’m gonna have to talk to him but… next week. I have shit to do this weekend.

And getting an orgasm isn’t one of them.

Anyway, half cracked is crushingggg. Supposedly. But idc. I just need to bust a nut.

I’m such a man, it’s ridiculous.

Memorable Tinder Profiles Part 11

Mother fucker…. what the shit is this messy profile?

No punctuation…talking about your past troubles… you’re not getting a match with this poor representation of everything…

plus, you’re not that good looking. Might as well be the type that puts their phone number on their profile.

I’m Late

For research lab right now. I got a horrible headache…. I’m dead.

God, the boss is looking doable today. I want to spank that ass! Ok, let me stop… hahaha.

I am the pro tip master. So I tried to give some protips to one of my pupils in the Physics dept. I think he took them with a grain of salt… but lol so funny….

I ran into the half cracked dude today…. I actually hit him up earlier because he told me he did some biochem stuff, so I was trying to get help…. but he was getting coffee at the little coffee place on campus. We walked together to our other destination….

He’s so awkward… it’s so awkward. He’s also SUPER short. Holy shit, I did not notice before… but lol…

Imagine that out of the three of them, he has the biggest wiener… πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ that would be what would happen too.

Lmfao… πŸ˜‚

My Biochem

Professor is also russian, and I cannot understand this man

I should’ve took Russian.

Shit is OD bro. Help Max!

I love Max, btw. He’s been looking extra sexy lately.

I hate biochem though.

I LOVE biophysical chemistry. It just goes in line with what I enjoy about chemistry.

Biophysics sounds so interesting to me… some grad school ideas… πŸ€”

I made plans with a new prospect this weekend. I’m hoping I get an orgasm before I lose my mind.

I know this means that physics is on pause until further notice. Once I cream my pants, I may entertain those poor guys again.

We’re just fucking animals

Dead ass. That’s all I have to say.

Omfg! Lmfao. Dude keeps wearing this hat… idk of the dad hair is thinning and he’s trying to find something to fix that.

I laughed so hard when he saw me and just turned around. Lmfao. Is and will always be a fucking pussy.

He is so odd though. Like I know I’m a fucking weirdo… but he’s just a really strange fucking weirdo.

Instead of being a normal person and avoiding having to avoid me, he made it so that I could influence his moves. It’s giving up a lot of power.

Gotta Werk.

So I’ve just been killing myself this entire day, making excel spreadsheets and reading through Wednesday’s lab.

It’s a lot, but I’m here for it bitch.

I realized that I’m not as focused this semester as I was at the start of a lot others, and I just need to start from an empty slate and not allow myself any distractions.

So I don’t plan on leaving Albany in the next 3 months, or putting myself out there for substandard sex and some gifts.

I’m ok with this. I think I needed to clear everyone out and start a new.

Sad that I would rather have terrible virgin sex than normal last a while but mechanical sex.

I can’t deny a lack of physical attraction… just can’t. They’ll all be ok though!

So Lol

I don’t think I’ve talked out this publicly, so here the fuck we go…

There is 1 physicist who is completely aware, one that knows practically nothing, and one that only knows half of the story.

It’s so fucking funny!

So Saturday Morning, I was awoken by a bunch of hey text messages by half the story dude. He was obviously drinking. He invited me to come out, at like 1 am. Lmfao. Completely aware dude is so scared about me even going out by myself at night, he wouldn’t have even asked…

But I guess the completely aware dude was hanging with him all night long, so was Fatty, and I actually came up.


I’m guessing they didn’t tell Fatty.

I was supposed to see the aware physicist but he was zombiefied, supposedly. I told him I would train him later and he totally didn’t understand what I meant. LMFAO.

These guys are just so nerdy. It’s pretty fucking hilarious.

Aware guy and I had the funniest convo about this. It was pretty great.

As long as Fatty doesn’t find out my stealth moves, I think we’re good. Just everyone, keep your mouth shut!