Horrible (I Need To Change This Adjective To ‘Memorable’) Tinder Profiles 7

Damion, For fucks sake, would you explain this a little further please?

If you are serious, why do you think typing out your problems for your Tinder description would get you any likes?

If you’re not serious, this isn’t a very funny joke and I’ll tell you why:

Your grammar and spelling are just too bad. You refuse to use periods, but you have that one fucking comma there that’s just so irritating.

But fine, joke wise, I give it a C-. I think the talk of marriage on Tinder is a little scary for swipers like me that have a nice bunch to pick from, so that makes the joke totally not funny enough to be your entire description.

The talk of money is just so tacky. I don’t think that should be a topic talked about like that because you make it seem like an obligation and not because you wanted to do those things for your partner.

Looks wise, you are also not very good looking. Nigga out here lookin’ like a milk dud… actually he looks like a Whopper! Lmfao I need to be arrested! I’m just an asshole.

Just being straight up

Then we got a little issue…

I met homeboy on Saturday after being friends for almost two years. I would call him and go on and on about my relationship issues and my decision to be non monogamous, so this little tidbit is a little creepy.

He already said some off the wall shit like, “if you were mono I would have to make you my girlfriend” and I gave that statement a pass… now marriage? Are you serious?!

Deadass… that is what it is. I will NOT commit myself to one person because that makes them feel secure while I have so much love to give…

This isn’t your father’s brand of dating… it’s mine! And I can be in a serious relationship while being poly. They’re not mutually exclusive.

I cannot stand these traditional men!! They’re so annoying!!

Good goddamn it

Are you really that dumb people? Seriously. I got a rather large cock sent to my phone four times last night.

It’s obvious this is a guy that knows he has no personality so he has to show off his cock. Well, I have one already. I don’t need two. What makes you different?

(I meant that I had a guy with a larger cock, not that I have one. But if I did, it would be the biggest one ever cause I’m that nigga!)

I like guys that aren’t gonna do all that. Like ok, we are all horny… but calm the fuck down!

Anyway,.. I’ve scheduled myself mostly for the end of the week. I need to kinda figure shit out!

Physics!!