Some people get totally butthurt when you’re all like, nah, I don’t wanna see you anymore.

It’s like, dude, you did something tacky, I called your ass out on it. Whatever. But this was even before I realized that he was a little snowflake bitch!

I can’t believe 32 year old men are out here claiming that they are all these weird sexualities and genders. And I’m not talking trans cause I can understand that to a certain degree….

But the whole demisexual shit… are you serious? Most people need to have a deeper connection with someone before they sleep with them. Lol why are we labeling all this normal shit?

Then we got this…

I’m confused… we’re friends…

I asked for a favor, then I got someone else to do that favor…and you’re getting angry, why?

Am I obligated as a friend to let you know when I’m free all the time? Am I obligated as a friend to hang out with you no matter what we are doing? Maybe it’s an obligation to let you know whenever I have my only day that I’m not doing shit because I have to tell you…

Can someone please explain this? because I thought as friends it didn’t matter… none of my friends text me every other day to see if I want to hang out! none of them!

So idk. If you get to the fwb, you’re already clingy. 🥾 🥾 🥾

Suck it nigga!

(Come undone, etc)



He’s not here!! I’m just bullshitting the day away working on this project. Im almost done though!

A week before it’s due. Maybe I’ll work on what I’m going to say.

Anyway, I finally got my Monday’s and Tuesday’s cleared! Right in time for school to start! It’s perfect because my schedule will be a bitch.

But seriously… can someone tell me WHERE THE FUCK IS MAX?!?! Shit nigga!

This is abhorrent! I can’t believe this pussy shit!

Whilst my fat ass is chillin’ on a garbage can!

He’s here! It’s noon! Nigga didn’t have shit for me!

Oh noooo!! So we just had an epic fail occur in the lab, this fucking guy came I. And was all like, “I’m gonna upgrade your windows” so Max goes, “yeah, sure”

This negro updates the system… but wipes out all of our data!! Everything… gone!!

I’m not that upset because I know I can get my data from the NMR room… but brooo!!

I find it delightfully hilarious how cavalier Max is about this.

He’s all like, “oh well, I’ll have to redownload everything”

Muhan likes to cry, so right after he told us, I ran out!

Shit sucks, then you perish!

Horrible Tinder Profiles Part 5

Um… there’s a reason why you’re single, lady!

First off, for being that high maintenance, you’re not that good looking!

Secondly, how do you go on a first date and ask your date (whom you may have known for maybe a few days) their credit score. That’s tacky.

I don’t think she’s getting many matches… but she is getting desperate dudes to swipe right.

Oh No!

Fuck. I actually will have this convo cause he likes shit that I like. And just because shit didn’t work out at one point, doesn’t mean it has to be that way for this shit.

Fuck. I kinda wish I could talk about it, but there’s too many mother fuckers reading this shit!

I’m screen capping the fuck out of it.

Dinner with Joe got awkward.

I was talking about how much time I don’t spend at home, and how I would probably sleep there that night.

All of a sudden, the waitress comes over and he asked to get a split bill. It was super tacky. He could’ve waited til the waitress left and had us split it in a different way… like I would give him the cash.

My order was about $15… I had $10. I could’ve put my $10. And have him charge it. But because he wanted to be so tacky, he ended up paying for the entire thing.

I split the check with what’s his face… and the way in which he did it was honorable. It’s awkward, but I paid with my card, and he gave me cash. It wasn’t as fucking in your face as this cornball nigga.

But honestly, he seemed kinda boring. His conversions were kinda gay. Like, “what’s your favorite movie?” “What do you like to read?” “What was the last concert you went to?”

Besides that, he is dating someone who is not physically attracted to him and it sounded like he basically had to change who he was for her.

Any mother fucker that withholds pussy from themselves is either gay or likes to feel sexually frustrated.

If I fucked that nigga, he would’ve probably popped after 2 pumps. Cause we all know I got the good good good!

When I talked about just paying rent and being low on cash, this mother fucker asks, “did you talk to your primary about moving in together?”

Excuse me, my primary owns multiple properties around here… if I needed a place, I would talk to him… but we also just started dating and I would never move in with ANYONE that quick.

I like being with him two nights a week. It works well for what we are doing. I’m not the clingy type.

He is that intense that he remembered James’s name and shit… crazy…

Anyway, I don’t think I’m good for being the other woman. It’s not gonna work. Plus, I don’t think I want to sleep with him or am attracted to him in that way.

He’s too into spiritual shit. Like horroscopes and other bullshit.

Like my sun’s in Aquarius. I’m a rising Taurus and my moon is in Scorpio.

That just means, I’m an asshole. But you didn’t have to read my horroscope to know that.

But fine. So he’s out. I can’t do anything on Mondays and Tuesdays anymore. I’m just tired!

But I think Dustin, James, Josh and ONE rando per week is ok.

I don’t want to be your fuck toy, or the other woman. I don’t like that.

I refuse to split boring dates, or even good dates, anymore. You have to pay until the 3rd date. That’s all.

He’s such a good voice of reason…

I’ll bring the weed if you smoke, you get the fucking $13 bill. Goddamn. I think for dating standards, that’s pretty good if you get to have sex with me later… Josh waited, Russell waited… you can too!



So no Joe. I might see Kev before Joe, honesty. Though I know I’m not attracted to Kev.

Ugh but I wanna fuck this dude right here.

Dark Matter!