I wonโ€™t let them take you, hell no.

I almost forgot that Albany’s bus system Sucks. I was thinking of putting my car back on the road. Soon.

I brought mad shit to school today because I can be in my office, that’s right, my desk in the lab is my office. You can gladly email me at my email address and meet me at my office…

But I got this physical chemistry book. I opened it last night, shit looks like a physics textbook. I’m so over it.

I actually have a lot of shit I need to do before Saturday… so I’m gonna do it!

I’ll fuck next week. But holla at me Maximus.

Dude, the dad wear has gone to an all time high. Why?!? In the name of fucking Jesus Christ do I not ever see anyone sexy… ever. Shit is so lame.

That dad outfit gotta go tho, if you’re tryna get pussy. If not, keep doing what you’re doing bro. Nothing is stopping you from achieving your goals.

๐Ÿ I’m an asshole.

I Havenโ€™t

I haven’t talked about the physics in a while… my blog is getting boring, I’m sorry, but I haven’t really been thinking about our mathematical friends in the past few days.

I’m taking some graduate level courses, bitch.

Not saying I’m not dtf (I always am) but it’s a complicated situation. Is it worth it?

Probably not… but we got a three day weekend. If both parties get bored enough, me especially, I’ll go back on the prowl.

Right now, I’m ok without it.

But that guy is pretty sexy, not even gonna lie bro.

I was a little less drunk (127% less drunk) last time we did the do… and some things became apparent…

I told you about how I’m gonna try to train dude to handle my pussy… well, it might take a little bit, but I think it could be done.

He just needs more practice! ๐Ÿ˜‹

When the others are concerned, I haven’t seen any of them. (Well the ones I’m tryna see anyway. I think I saw Fat dude that I will not call fatty anymore a few days ago… but none of the prime sexy beasts)

My ass got so fucking fat though! It literally sticks out, I can’t hide it…. I need to stop eating.

Hopefully I have sex soon because my pussy is ready to (actually) sit and ride something.

(That position is a weakness for some people)

Plus, I would like to finally have another orgasm caused by a male. I think the difference now is that I’m not doing a girthy dude. That shit used to hit with Sean.

But he was a psychotic fuck…

Only. Use me. More.

Let’s see…

I get so fucking scared that I literally shake and sweat my balls off every time I have to go into his office.

I just feel like he’ll be like, you’re fired, bitch. And I’ll be all like OMG. No…

but holy shit, I’m tired right now. In the very least I would want him to not make me do anything.

I feel extra fat today… for no reason! Well, maybe because I’ve been acting extra fat lately.

I haven’t eaten my all my dates leftovers or anything, or start licking my fingers like I have no home training… but I am fat.

My ass is huge! It doesn’t help at all.

So max told me that he wants to continue paying me during the semester. Woot!!

I came up with a plan to study Arabic and have fun… and this plan includes me studying Arabic while stoned, and also taking all my exams stoned. Hahahaha we will see!

so I asked Nerdy friend Bryan to teach me calculus III. Even though I don’t need it, it can only help. But it seems as if he cleared his entire schedule to do this.

And he’s also asking me to bring alcohol… I hope he knows I don’t want to do anything with him… like sexually. Just teach me the math and let’s go ma dude.

So I bought my new Juul (what we left off on yesterday) it’s only $20. Plus I’m not about to ask that man to look for it.

Today, I have one of the Russian teachers. I love Russians…. I mean, I guess I love Max because he’s so cavalier. Hopefully all Russians are like that. hahaha

Then I got the Orgo on steroids later. Kill me dead!!

I’ve been a ghostface killah lately.

I’m sorry, all these niggas is getting ghosted until I figure out how to juggle these 17 credits.

I just saw my final. I fucked up on question 3… question 5, I was able to do pretttywell until nigga said derive this equation… I was like naaah!

But OMG!! Max isn’t back yet… I need this man to come back and let me know what he wants me to do the rest of the semester.

The Russian dude wasn’t that bad. He was really friendly. I dipped out 20 minutes early though. What he was talking about wasn’t severely important though.

All I know is… bio chem is a very mysterious class. My professor hasnt put it on blackboard, no books were required for the class… and I’ve never even seen this professor before.

I’m just going to record every lecture just in case this class is like bio and requires you to memorize a bunch of shit.

Omg… there’s so many grad students in this class. If the new dude in my lab is in this class, I will study with his Iranian Ass. Oooh! Yes! He’s in here!

Omg. I just realized all the biology I don’t know, and it’s pretty bad… this class just started and this nigga just made it hard as fuck (not in a sexual sense)

Someone Knows Something.

I wish niggas would STFU!!

But LOLZ, I just saw the smelly TA waiting for the bus with me. Idt he takes my route but omg I will karate chop someone’s big ass head off if he ran his mouth.

I guess now that I’m almost certain that all the info is out there in the open, fuck it….

I’m sorry Nick, you were kinda boring… conversationally. But I’m sure you’re cool. But the video games, the amino acids and the boron… nah bro.

At least the Turkish dude came at me with the Bassnectar. And he’s rather entertaining, conversation-wise, anyway.

Plus he’s fucking sexy as fuck! (Sweats a fucking crazy amount though).

I feel as if I need to give Nick a compliment so here… you’re smarter than both those niggas. It’s not gonna get you any pussy, but it’s a good start.

I tried to be nice, but I’m not good at pretending. So whatever.

Someone has my fucking juul… I’m about to buy another one. For no reason!!

FML.

I Always Thought That You Would Beeeee The One…

School sucks the shit straight out of my ass, but I’m here. Learning some Arabic shit to make the man think I’m other worldly.

I’m dead ass planning to get a damn C- in that class, bro. Who the fuck wants to do this?

I can’t bullshit this like physics, or I’ll end up saying some rowdy ass shit I didn’t mean to. Oh well, I’ll figure it out. I REALLY DO NOT WANT TO BUY THAT GODDAMN TEXT BOOK.

It’s hard to look at me and think, woah, A student… but bitch… I do what the fuck I gotta to get to the next class ok…. this is all a sequence!

Max probably isn’t back yet, but I wish. I could atleast give him this bio statistics book I acquired from the bio dept. He’s so hot… I need to fucking stop.

I’ve tried to switch out of this Arabic class like 7 times, and still… I’m stuck here. So I’m just gonna pretend to pay attention. And just be on my phone the entire time.

I can’t wait to do some physics. God, am I actually saying this? Compared to this shit, I miss physics… I don’t wanna write any papers!!

“And if I wasn’t rich and already lit, I’d come where your house at.” DATAINTDABABYDATSMAHBAYBAY.

So I am now on my way to the fake physical chemistry class. They put it in the business building, I’m not sure why…. but I’m tryna sit right next to mehmet.

If I can get mehmet to like me like Max does (not sure if he actually likes me, but he definitely realizes my talent), I can do some biophysical research in his lab.

This is the first grad class that I am taking at this school. It’s a little intimidating… I don’t really even know if I remember how to integrate.

I feel like I forgot all that shit.

All I know is the definition of the first law of thermodynamics: deltaU = Q-W.

So the change in potential energy = heat created by system – work done on system (that might actually be incorrect)

Ok, yeah, that was wrong. Q = heat supplied by the system – W= Work done by the system

But if I can impress the entire dept this year, I’ll be in there!

Too many Turkish people/situations I’ve been in lately… oh well, I’m aiming for an A- in this class. Please for the love of god, give me an A- bro!!

All I need is an 80% average in this class for an A-, so I’m hoping I can get close.

Tomorrow, I’m gonna see Jesse to see my final… finally. I’ve been going through it in my head still I found out my score…

I either got a perfect score on 3 questions, and did decent on one to get 8 points, or I did two questions really well and two not so well.

I think #3 and #5 kicked my black ass. But when I saw the first problem and it was a mother fucking point charge, my ass was like… I can do this!

The last few questions were to derive a bunch of equations and all this bullshit like ain’t nobody in this class actually trying to get into theoretical physics so simmer your shit down, Jess.

But I’ll see how many points he gave me for putting something down.

68/100 earned me a fucking B+ so I was atleast decent compared to my classmates. Lmfao.

Mehmet wasn’t that bad actually! He was pretty nice, had a clear grading criteria… and seemed to be open to helping students during office hours.

I feel like I will be in this nights office a lot (he has the same office as Max… so I’ll be there whether I’m there for him or not.

woot! I’m ready for this semester to get it crackin’

Donโ€™t Tell.

So he’s not gonna tell. Supposedly. He tried to act like I was the person he was asking about this. Lol I said, “don’t tell anyone!!” Not even Nick bro!

Well, Nick… Hahahahahahahaha

So yeah, I just told him and his big ass head to STFU.

I decided, I will not call Eric Fatty anymore, it’s mean… and I’m fat now. Even though big Asian head dude was like, “yeah, you called him fat. But I don’t think you’re fat… I think the Starbucks guy was trying to write your name.” Lmfao

Still… I love sex with virgins.

I saw him on Tinder though. Obvious left swipe, but the pics are pretty bad. Maybe if he wasn’t such a douche, I’d help him get bitches.

(Since I’ve also been fucking one of his friends, and all his other friends also want to fuck me. This is hyperbolic. I don’t think that library dude would. The physics.)

But… yeah… I took a pic in this guy’s Rivers Cuomo glasses but I can’t post it.

His head is super large. I’m not even over exaggerating. I didn’t notice until yesterday.

I lost one of my juuls in his house or car or somewhere in my crib. My rooms a mess, that shit is a goner.

He likes using my juul too. Congrats!

I gotta start going to the gym like tomorrow morning. Before class. I’ve been acting so fat. lol.

This MOTHER FUCKER

Got me in here with all the Chinese students right now…

Max… ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW, BRO?

He’s paying me a full days wages for this… this is worst than when he had me rotovaping DMF off something.

Goddamn.

I’m suffering! I’m just waiting. Maybe after lunch I can leave and reconsider what the rest of my life will be while school is in session.

My hair wants to be dreads… I need to find someone willing to lock the fuck out of my hair.

But Max… please… bring that sexy ass back!!

I miss him, seriously.

I forgot to tell you guys the good news: I’m an Aquarius sun, Taurus rising and a Scorpio moon…

I guess that means something. Oh, also, most of my planets are in Capricorn. Mehhh.

I’m just a bitch, what astrological sign does that correspond to?

Let it go.

Honestly, the summer is officially over as far as I’m concerned…

So all the people I saw in July, the beginning, and you haven’t seen me since… you should probably give up.

My inbox is just so full with bullshit. I wanna ghost without any question… ya know?

But whatever…

I just want some regularity in the sex I am having.

Maybe make it a little better… I’m a little scared to even ask for better sex because I’ll be fucking really disgusting mother fuckers at that point. Hahahah

But whatever. Shooting shots

Jake is a Sick Puppy.

There’s something wrong with this man…

He’s such a sick fuck, it’s almost hilarious…

I can’t ask for advice because he always say some freaky shit!

Anyway… Neuton epsilon Tesla Force Inductance current variable is the answer.

Don’t worry about it.

I need to actually start working out. Like for real. So I’m thinking on Mondays, I’ll start going with James to the gym.

This is what I get for calling people fat, now I feel fat.

Lmfao.

That starbucks employee really knew my complex!

Whatever. I don’t have plans for this weekend… I really need to order by books, maybe buy some notebooks and shit. I know I’ll need a really neat one for biochem…

It’s like Orgo on steroids (which are lipids, btw).

Mehhhhh!! And it takes me a minute to settle in on a new routine. Monday’s, Wednesday’s and Friday’s, my black Ass is taking Arabic class in the early afternoon and that shitty diet physics class right after.

Then Tuesday and Thursday, I got quant and bio chem.

Wednesday nights, quant lab. Niggas is deadass trying to cause me to jump off state quad.

Memorable Tinder Profiles Part 9


Now… now… now…

Lookie what we got here…

David, you are 35 (or so your profile says), but you look like you’re in your mid 40s… at least.

I guess that can or cannot be your fault. I guess you have a 50-50 responsibility problem with that.

Fine, but looking for friends that will lead to marriage?! Bro, you’re on tinder…

I honestly believe any person that actually goes on tinder looking for some type of a “real” relationship will be very sad in the end.

Tinder is all about the anonymity of dating.

A shit load of first dates; maybe a second one. You might hook up on the first date, you might hook up on the third.

You might be a one-night stand, or you might not…

It’s a fucking crapshoot; you’re looking in the wrong place.

He deadass looks like my gym teacher in high school though. Coach Burke!

Oh another thing, I haven’t really been paying attention, but his profile also states that he is unemployed. How do you legitimately expect to find marriage on tinder if it says you’re unemployed?!

And the Skillet, to top this sundae off with more shit that is such a damper to an already difficult profile to like. Damn man.

You really need to actually think about what you’re doing in life, David.

This is just a female POV.

I Just Donโ€™t Like Having Sex With Hot People

Seriously… something is fucking wrong.

Any time I think someone is hot, they fail to deliver….

I’m dating fat mother fuckers from now on bro.

I’m just kidding.

But this has to do with the Engineer. Wtf.

I’d rather go with the closer option. Fuck Troy bro.

It’s kinda the same except um a major detail that makes it not really the same.

I’m so stupid.

Lmfao.

But decisions… I should’ve boxed up that diner though. I’m so hungry and stoned right now. I’m about to cook, that’s how hungry I am.

But anyway, I’ll figure out the fwb situation soon… hopefully.

I have some things to work with I guess.

I think I might go on one more date. Fuck!! I don’t want to… but, I might. Honestly. I’m ripping my weave out right now so I might go off tinder until I feel like I like my hair.

But seriously… wtf. I keep typing this then get distracted by comparing the last two weeks.

Whatever. We’ll see.

This Is What I Get

For calling Eric Fatty all the time, I know, it’s not very nice…

But ok… after trying to complete the trifecta of Physicists, I decided…

Let’s call Friday dude Turkey… then my TA from yesteryear, we’ll call him Neuton.

So, Turkey’s got most of everything I’d want in a fuck buddy… except the fuck!

I’m willing to give him a pass because he’s so fucking hot.

So I don’t even really know what he wants to do. We’ll find out soon enough. He may not, and that’s ok.

Now, fucking neuton… he’sgot no chance. I’m not even gonna give him my phone number.

It’s even difficult for me to pretend to like him.

So I guess the gamut I planned to run has some logistical issues… to complete the trifecta, maybe I should do the unthinkable and fuck Pedro… it’s the only way.

Come here, Pedro… let me get that sweet scent of roses! ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜

I. Am. A. Fucking. Asshole.

But James was cheering me on for the trifecta but… it’s just not a thing man. Sorry Neuton.

This

More Game

I’ve talked to one person on Tinder the entire day, but still… I get all these fucking matches. I swiped a little… but didn’t match someone purposefully.

If I get to 500, I will not be surprised. But I literally haven’t talked to anyone… school’s starting, and I just want someone who wants to fuck sometimes around my school schedule…

Please!!! Hahaha

I know I want to do that one physicist again. I got this engineer, right… then I need one more that’s gonna understand the lack of regularity… also to have one yes when everyone else says no.

School bitches!!

Teach class, get ass. (Wow what the fuck am I even saying… I think it’s cause I’m fucking all these TA’s ) hahaha

1….2….3….. FIND THE GOOD PHYSICIST!!!

(Come on, Turkey… you are in the lead of sexy.)

Even though

Friday can’t fuck for shit, he has the makings of someone whom can be trained… ya know…

This one I’m talking to right now is a little… well, bland.

Friday is also sexy as fuck… but I’m not really sure how I can get this to work. Maybe, I can wait til I’m bored… then ask him if he wants to make out and fuckkk.

He was a good kisser! I will not take that away.,. He just needs practice. Lmao

This week it’s just Dylan and James. Dylan was hot as fuck, bro!

And an engineer… hey, I’m attracted to the mathematical mind.

Fuck it!

Who does it hurt?

Lmfao. But I know these nerds will not shut the fuck up!!

Zip it!!

I gotta get one of them to shut the fuck up. I’m thinking Friday dude is too stupid to talk. But he should still just shut it. I don’t think he’s ever on campus so maybe I have nadda to worry about… I think.

I’m taking over, niggas!

Honestly, I love me some RPI engineers and some Of the physics from my school, fuck you! Leave me aloneeeee!!

Iโ€™m Just A Kid.

And life is a nightmare. But ugh…

Am I really a mature adult?

Can I stop being an asshole trying to prove a point? I know there’s an advisor out there that doesn’t wanna deal with the bullshit…

So can I just be an adult for once in my fucking life?

Or if we’re all adults, who cares?

I am in my fucking prime, ladies and gentlemen. Let me rock.

I obviously have some kind of strange fetish geared towards dudes that can do shit that I can’t… but at the end of the day they’re all an incomplete piece of a perfect person.

Thus, I gotta get it how I live!

Fuck, like as much as I act the contrary, I am an adult…

we all are.

So why would this effect anyone?

Let a nigga live her life, bro!

To be honest through, that is all a romanticized version of what I would care to see/..

There are people who should know that I’m a fucking bitch.

And they do know…

They just want to opportunity to fuck me.

Itโ€™s a dichotomy

Ok, like listen before you judge me ok…

So we got these scientist who don’t get ass… then not scientists that do. It’s like what do I do…

I’m obviously innately attracted to the non pussy getting scientist… but I just want to have an orgasm!

Fucking hell tho. Shit

I can’t stop laughing at what my life is right now. Lmfao.

Oh well. Going for 3/3!

Ok, so, lmfao…but… how am I gonna match with his best friend? This is bad… Fati… stop this!! But hahahahahahahaha

God, this is so bad.

It’s actually quite funny. Who’s the dept gonna be talking about more? Well… since I’m taking it over… listen, just hang on… let me create my spreadsheet first, then I’ll figure out the rest.

I’ll bring home the Turkey, if you bring home the bacon.