In Just A Few Hours…

Sean has turned everything from really fucking good… to really fucking bad.

I’m done with this back and forth.

So I was just joking around with him and I said something about him finally being a responsible adult for going to the grocery store, and he called me and says, “what is going on?” And I said, “what’s going on about what?l and he goes, “I’ve been here cooking for us tomorrow and blah blah blah…”

He raised his voice and I told him I would hang up. And I did.

This is not shit people who have only been hanging out for 2 and a half weeks should be going through.

I realized that our personalities really do not mesh.

We were supposed to walk around Washington Park, but I canceled our plans. I told him that I needed to figure out if I still wanted to do this.

It was just too much too soon. And all of our baggage just clashed.

I asked him to bring my things that I left at his house. He brought them.

He had tears in his eyes. As much as I wanted to hold him and kiss him and care, my brain told me that this is going to continue to be an issue.

I told him that if I decide to continue, it won’t be the same. I wouldn’t consider just being with him anymore.

I would continue to date other dudes.

I made plans with Josh in the meantime and I told Sean that I am going through with those plans.

I think he finally left.

I don’t mean to be so unemotional, but I learned from the best… good ol’ Eric!

Like, I can’t put my emotions into anything. That is the one thing I am completely protective over. I’m sorry, but it will be tough to get me to let go of my emotions.

So, I don’t know if I will see Sean tomorrow, or ever again. It does suck because these past few days have been amazing… but I understand now that it will be a back and forth thing if I continue.

The Day I Dump Russell

Is the day Sean knows I’m all his.

I’m not making any decision like that right now, after 3 weeks of knowing this guy.

He could be a compulsive liar for all I know. I’m not dumping Russell anytime soon. I like me some Russell… but I do need to make a decision…

Who am I going to allow to tap it raw? Honestly, Sean already wins. He gave me an orgasm! (Actually, two) And he knows exactly how to do it!!

I wonder how Russell will take the news. Like hey bro, we can fuck, but you need to wrap it now.

I think it’ll be fine. He’s pretty agreeable.

But now that I got rid of the Connor situation, I feel a lot better. He was getting way too attached after hanging out once.

Sean really is not going to like this, but he can fuck off. I’m not canceling everyone. And he needs to know that I’m having sex with other people.

If that’s a dealbreaker, then I am sorry. The deal is broken.

I’m Sick

Figuratively and literally.

I keep coughing, my voice sounds like a dude. I can’t sing right now. I’m just fucked.

I got Sean sick too. Wanderlust!

I hope max doesn’t fire me. I’m not taking time off… I’m just sick as fuck. Oh god. He started coughing too! I’m getting everyone ill.

Sean is making a lemon and ginger concoction that he claims will cure this cough. Meheh! We will see.

So Sean has this epic picnic planned for us at Peebles Island again. I told him to make it more romantic this time (as if laying on top of him in his hammock then making out in the wet grass wasn’t romantic the first time)

but I wanna go all out. Wine, fruit… hotdogs. Lmao. It will be cute!

Tonight, him and I will walk around Washington Park and be sexy together.

Max is being Uber nice to me today. He called my eyes beautiful brown eyes. Lol get at me daddy!

So we’re creating this completely unknown compound that even Max doesn’t know how it’s supposed to look.

I’m on the cutting edge, sluts!