I Walked

Miles last night. Miles away from a dude name Ber? Berrrr? Brrrahh? What in the shut kinda shit is dis?

Let me get serious for one moment… so I met him at Madison Pour House. He was a complete beer nerd. So annoying. He wanted to try everything… I just got the juice bomb which I knew I liked.

He kept complaining about every fucking beer, even the one he ordered which he didn’t try for some reason. I just wanted to sit, so finally, the idiot picks a beer out.

We sit. He’s asking all these crazy questions. He told me he had 8 siblings. He actually had it on his profile, but I’m sorry, I have many matches and many people I was chatting with, I only look at a profile for a moment.

Finally, we were gonna leave. I tried to end it there, he was pushy.

I texted my secret weapon. Jake! I was like bro call me with an emergency now bro.

So he calls and lmfao I was dying when he said this… he said, “there is a small fire I need you in the lab now”

So he had to drive me there. God he was annoying. He kept touching my ass. I felt trapped. But I had to play it cool so I made out with him (horrible kisser) then I ran off.

He kept texting me and I’m talking to Jake like WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO?

Jake says, just tell him you aren’t feeling it. Ugh. That’s so hard to do. So I just ignored him when he kept texting me.

If that lame mother fucker thinks he will ever enter my body… I have a lot of work to do. Obviously I’m not as accomplished as I want to be.

So today, I’m going to the fucking gym. Somethings gotta give.

Obviously I’m the problem.

Well, another day, another lunch date. Let’s get this free food!

I’ve always wanted to go to the iron gate cafe, so today’s the day.

He still reached out. Lord Christ give men the ability to read my fucking mind cause idk wtf to do anymore.

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