I Wish I Wasn’t So Shallow

Honestly, lately I’ve been angry at myself for many things… like not being able to deal with areas in which you don’t level up.

Things that I would have to settle for, and live with; these same things that cannot be changed.

Living in somewhat of an avoidance of putting myself “out there” on front street, and feeling dissatisfied for the rest of my life.

If not for that, I still wouldn’t think I would budge. I’d feel a hunger and do something to crush you. I’d rather not crush you. But it’s hard to tell a young person who hasn’t been involved in something so serious that you regret it getting that serious.

It sucks because I thought I could live with it. Emotionally, mentally, everything was linked… physically, we were not a match.

It may be me that is asking for too much. For something to finally feel satisfying… that is my mistake. Allowing you to choose the pace at which we moved being inexperienced is also my biggest mistake.

Now I’m in a place where I’m losing an important part of my life because I just can’t seem to become satisfied.

I wish I had the power to look past it…

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