I Don’t Get It

My cousin’s getting married next Friday. And I don’t want to go to the wedding. 

The reason why I don’t want to go is, I feel like an embarrassment to my family. And my dad has kinda made that clear. I’m embarrassing because look at what I’m doing compared to my sister or everyone else’s children.

This has caused a huge complex. I don’t want to be near any family members. Well, my sister is part of the bridal party. My dad is the MC of the thing, and I get asked to serve food. 

I kindly declined. And my dad tells me that I’m becoming American and it’s sad. Well, being African equals being something I’m not. Doing something I don’t want to because it’s the right thing and pretending like I’m someone I’m not. I’m that case, I’m American. 

I’m such a disappointment, why would I wanna go anywhere? 

My brother and I talked about it, if you don’t say happy birthday and shit, we’re not going to your event. And that’s it.

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